There are few things in life that I feel obligated to wax poetic on. Some things I’m sorry, I’m just not sorry about. If this means I can’t be part of the cool kids table, than so be it. Life is too short to be so serious about everything. I’d love to have more followers on my blog and be popular and part of the greater blogger community. I just don’t want to have to compromise what is good for me right now.
1. Every day I see at least 2 links about how diet soda is evil incarnate on Facebook and Twitter. Granted, I am sure some of what is being said is true. I know there are far better things to drink, and BTW I already drink a ton of water. (Ex. last night at the gym 66 ounces +) But, I like diet Coke/Pepsi/root beer. It isn’t like I’m drinking gallons of it per day, but I like it and until my GP tells me otherwise, I have no plans to give it up. I’ve given it up in the past for Lent and such, and it hasn’t changed anything about my weight, mood, behaviour, cravings, or what have you. And since I don’t really drink (I can count on one finger the amount of alcoholic drinks I’ve had this year) I think I can allow myself the diet soda. (And no, I am not saying alcohol is bad. I just really don’t care for it much.) And I just do not feel bad about enjoying things I like. Sorry, I’m not sorry.
2. I like coffee. No, I love coffee. And I have no plans to give it up either. Again, I’m not drinking gallons of the stuff, maybe 2 cups a day. I may have more if I need to really wake up, or I am traveling, or I have a deadline. I like my coffee sweet and creamy. I use cream and stevia in my coffee. If I have it iced (at home) I have it half semi skimmed/cream. If I’m out I have it how my mood fits, either with regular or skimmed. Here in the UK there aren’t the fun flavoured creamers like back in the States and I miss the all natural vanilla coffeemate. Sorry, I am SO not sorry for loving my coffee.
3. I used to be a vegetarian, but I am not any more. I liked being veggie, but I was crap at it and lived on pasta and lots of carbs. (Funny, I did lose most of my weight while veggie, but that has more to do with insane calorie restriction and extreme exercise than anything else.) I haven’t had red meat since I was 11, and have no desire to have it. I never really liked it, so it is no big deal to me.
I’d love to do it again, but with my current food allergies/restrictions it would be impossible IMHO. There would be very little protein besides eggs and cheese in my diet and I have found that with PCOS I need more protein and less carbs in my diet. I am allergic to soy (so soybeans, edamame, tofu, etc), nuts (peanuts, hazelnuts) and peas. When I was allergy tested 8 years ago I was still on benadryl since I was covered in hives and had them down my throat and had issues breathing (yet the ER did nothing for me) so I am unsure to the extension of the nut allergy and need to have the testing redone out of curiosity. I also have a sensitivity to fruit with skin including apples, pears, and plums. My lips swell and my ears and throat get itchy. I just can’t be sorry for having food allergies I can’t control.
4. Snacks, sweets and all that good stuff. I like it too. I try to find room in my diet to have something I like everyday. When I lost 85 pounds before, I did not have that mentality. I worried eating half a cookie would be a dangerous slide back into eating rubbish. I was so strict, that when I lost all the weight (and thought once I was done I’d be skinny and perfect and beautiful and everyone would love me and I’d never be fat again) that I allowed myself to enjoy the things I missed. So this time around, I am enjoying what I have and not depriving myself. So, sorry, I’m not sorry for enjoying good, yummy food (in moderation).
5. Finding that I have to (at least this point in my journey) exercise in moderation. I can’t do back to back Tae Bo classes and then walk on the treadmill like I used to before. When I lost weight before I was a decade + younger and had a lot more energy and drive. Now at closer to 40 than 20, I find I have to find a balance that works for me. Yesterday I did an hour of weight lifting and then a spinning class. This morning walking the mile to uni to drop off some paperwork was killer on my thigh muscles. I’m hoping as I continue on, it will be easier so I can have a day like yesterday and have the following day not a waste of a day with muscle aches and exhaustion. I also have to factor in things like the chronic pain condition (daily headache syndrome) and social anxiety which has really flared up recently. Some days I can hardly get out of the flat, never mind to the gym. Some days I am fine, like today. I went out and enjoyed my time out and wasn’t bowled over by crippling fear. So days when I just can’t work out, sorry, I’m not sorry, it’s just hard being me sometimes and I have to make the best choices I can for me. 🙂